Circumlocution for Dummies

2008 Block Party

2012-01-28T16:24:00.001-05:00

Who knew this would be the end of what was fast-becoming an institution?

Certainly not me.

Later

Dumb

2012-01-28T15:40:00.001-05:00

I've been blogging for twelve-plus years now. I've been at it so long, I can barely recall life before blogging.

I've gone places and done things most people would never even dare to dream about doing. I've met the movers and shakers. I've met those who shape the news. I've met those who report the daily news. And I've had my few fleeting moments of ill-found celebrity.

I've made a gaggle of new friends because of my electronic exploits. And I've also created a still growing army of people who despise me for it.

Still, in retrospect, I think I'm dumb for having done so.

Later

Socks for Jocks

2012-01-28T10:28:00.001-05:00

Wanna know what pisses me off to no end?

No? Tough, here it comes.

It pisses me off when radio talk show hosts, who cannot generate calls despite the perceived importance of their chosen subject matter, make cracks about how the listening audience must be too easily distracted by things such as American Idol, NASCAR or pro sports in general.

In other words, since they cannot motivate us to call, we're flat-out accused of being easily distracted, stupid, politically lethargic and/or not nearly as engaged in the pressing matters of the day as they are.

First of all, I did not destroy the United States, the self-centered politicians and the know-it-all pundits took care of all of that. And to imply that our undying allegiance to Ricky Rudd or our fascination with any or all facets of pop culture is leading us closer to the abyss is so much tainted swill, even the societal piglets shy away from it.

Let's assume that I pay too much attention to pro football when I could be devoting myself entirely to saving the world. So what? I'm not some former prostitute turned congressional wonk, or some former drug-crazed hippie turned all-knowing proprietor of ever-flowing wisdom.

I'm just some guy who loves barely controlled ultra violence, and I need not be chastised because someone else needs ratings to remain under-employed. In addition to that, even if I was distracted by singing boobs auditioning for other marginally talented singing boobs on television, such a distraction does not a war, a deficit or a partisan divide make.

The so-called know-it-alls of the world are destroying things quite nicely without any of my input, so why take an on-air dump on me when you've set off on some boring radio tangent?

And what, pray tell, do the self-important radio talk show hosts do when they are not on the air covering the important stuff? Uh, do they lock themselves in a room and strategize about how best to save Amerika herself? Or do they drink and dance and twist and strum just like those they would so easily chastise? Do they rub their mutated members up against their pathetic honies, or do they sit alone and click on every single link at Real Clear Politics?

Look, talking about the issues does not a Ghandi make. Conversely, not talking or caring about the issues does not make for a chump, or add to any part of any existing problem.

Do you really want to chastise somebody? Yeah, then chastise those same few insider folks you so predictably go all weak-kneed for.

Or as we used to say back in the day before talk radio, put a sock in it!

As for me...

I'd like to teach the world to sing...

Later

Kistler

2012-01-28T03:46:00.002-05:00

Unfortunately, I was there.

Remember, I’m the termite technician. And as soon as Spring arrives in full, I’ll be right back to doing what I do best…using termite biology and termite behavior against termites…the only insects that can digest cellulose, uh, wood, er, your biggest investment.

W-B school sprayed for bed bugs

According to Wilkes-Barre Area Superintendent Jeffrey Namey, a single bed bug was found on the floor of a fifth-grade classroom Thursday. Students were removed from the classroom, their parents were contacted and an extermination company was brought in, Namey said.
The exterminators did not find any additional bed bugs, but at their recommendation, the entire fifth-grade pod, a total of five classrooms, was sprayed for the bugs Friday evening, Namey said.
“We have expanded it beyond the scope of the original problem,” Namey said, adding that exterminators will also do a follow-up inspection following spraying.

I have no comment other than to say that the WBSD is taking this isolated incident very, very seriously and is sparing no expense.

Trust me on this.

Later

Barry says Malvinas, the British say Falklands

2012-01-28T02:08:00.004-05:00

Way, way south of here, way down there where the seas are frightfully cold and the land masses so rare, nobody would fight over any inch of that again, right?

Well, nobody paid the Falkland Islands any notice since 1982 until the British scored a major oil find in the territorial waters off of the Falklands.

Enter Barry Soreto…

Britain has received a slap in the face by its so-called closest ally, the US government, in a dispute with Argentina over the sovereignty of the Falkland Islands.
Washington once again put its weight behind Argentine when it endorsed Buenos Aires' call for negotiations to resolve an ongoing dispute over the chain of islands at the center of a 1982 war, British media reported.
The General Assembly of the Organisation of American States (OAS) at its meeting in San Salvador last Tuesday approved by unanimous consensus a draft declaration on the question of the Malvinas Islands, which was also endorsed by the Obama government, said the reports.
Critics accused the US of not only siding with Argentina, which had been heavily pushing the issue, but also with a number of anti-American governments including Hugo Chavez of Venezuela and Daniel Ortega of Nicaragua.
Britain and Argentina fought a bloody war in 1982 after Buenos Aires invaded the nearby islands. Hundreds of people were killed on both sides of the conflict. Since then the UK government has imposed sovereignty over the islands and grant islanders British citizenship.
Britain has also resisted international calls for the two nations to negotiate the issue. The latest declaration also called for Argentina and Britain to enter talks over the sovereignty of the Falklands.
Nile Gardiner, an analyst with the Heritage Foundation, referred to President Obama's recent visit to London, where he called US-UK partnership as “essential”, saying that “the US should at least stay neutral on the Falkland issue”.
"British sovereignty over the islands is not an issue for negotiation. ... This is a slap in the face for America's closest friend and ally," he said, adding “this is a bizarre foreign policy”.
Washington signed on to a similar resolution in June last year, and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton made it clear in a joint press conference with Cristina Kirchner in Buenos Aires in March 2010 that the Obama regime fully backs Argentina's calls for negotiations over the Falkands.
The State Department has also insultingly referred to the Islands in the past as the Malvinas, the Argentine name for them.

Enter history...1982...

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Face it confused folks, our secular socialist, Barry Soreto, has yet to a meet a long-standing American ally he wouldn’t screw over in the name of further world-wide revolution, tumult and uncertainty.

And the British?

Let them eat Michelle's tofu/wheat germ cake.

Later

Nike CEO at Paterno memorial

2012-01-27T23:23:00.000-05:00

Whether you agree or disagree with his very pointed sentiments on the Penn State Board of Trustees, you have to admire his willingness to speak his mind.

Well, at least I do.

Phil Knight...

Later

Cefalo at Paterno memorial

2012-01-27T11:13:00.003-05:00

Poignant, funny and sad.

Video: Jimmy Cefalo On The Paterno Way: MyFoxPHILLY.com

Austerity Now!

2012-01-27T10:30:00.002-05:00

What's all this confusion about Peyton Manning's immediate future?

I say he'd make a great backup to his brother Eli.

Just sayin.

When I was a kid, I did not miss a Coughlin football game unless work prevented me from attending.

I forget which season, but my cousin and I once walked from Wilkes-Barre to Wyoming Area’s football stadium so as to not miss the-then battle of unbeatens. 7-0, if I remember correctly. We often rode train box cars to games up Pittston way, as well as south towards Meyers’s stadium and Hanover. Walked to Plains stadium for every home game.

I especially liked attending games at Meyers when the most speediest of the players were poised to cut on that artificial rug. And to this date, the fastest person I ever saw playing on that rug was Pittston’s Jimmy Cefalo.

Being that I took those games way too seriously, Cefalo’s domination of Coughlin gave me fits. And yesterday, at Joe Paterno’s memorial, Jimmy Cefalo came real, real close to getting my tear ducts to activating. After all these years, one way or another, the guy is still getting to me.

So, we’ve gone and got our first ever county manager, some well-traveled guy from California, who is slated to take control of our county government in late February.

Meanwhile, it seems that our newly-seated council has adopted a budget that will include no new taxes, but significant staffing cuts. The dreaded A-word was even uttered…austerity.

And with that news the cries of reduced services rang out from both inside and outside the governmental fray. Yep, they say 100 or so layoffs will result in lessened services.

Really? Like what? Where’s the draconian hit? Seriously, can the average resident of Luzerne County get through a single week without the assistance of the Luzerne County government? Boy, I sure hope so.

What are we talking about here? Does the county provide life-sustaining services to very many of us? Or are we worried that it might take longer to get a dog license? What do we need more, convenience or a balanced budget?

During this Great Depression II, many, perhaps most businesses reduced staffing levels, which obviously means customer service took a hit. It’s inevitable. Oh, but we cannot slash public sector jobs. Oh, no, that might affect the services those jobs supposedly provide.

And in a county carrying a half billion in outstanding debts and paying crushing debt service payments on a yearly basis, that sort of thinking is useless, short-sighted poppycock.

It’s time that the folks paid to toil away under the rotunda start living within their means so as to not make it any more difficult for us to live under our means. Across-the-board cuts. Permanently furloughed employees. Union concessions. Divestitures. All of the above. Whatever it takes. It’s time.

Austerity Now!

And how ‘bout this one…

Outspoken residents again overshadow W-B council meeting

WILKES-BARRE - Peter Gagliardi called Thursday night for a more civil discourse between city council and its frustrated residents, even outlining three principles he believes will help keep increasingly sensational encounters off of YouTube.
"After a while, these episodes rub off on your reputation," said Gagliardi, of South Hancock Street. "After a while, people are going to think of Wilkes-Barre as a place it's just a never-ending mudslinging contest."

Hallelujah! I’ve been saying this for years, that the monthly freak shows at city hall accomplish nothing, save for damaging the city’s reputation.

Oh, and now that the long sought after credit card receipts have been found, what next? Indictments? Hand cuffs? Perp walks? Not likely.

But with the discovery of the long-illusive statements, I see yet another city employee, Marie McCormick, has been vilified by the so-called activists.

Here’s one for you: Name for me a city hall employee who has not been vilified, defamed, slandered or libeled by the self-appointed defenders of humanity and you will win a prize not donated by a mystery philanthropist.

And they wonder why I stopped attending the monthly freak shows. Er, the city council meetings.

Later

Jintszilla II?

2012-01-23T17:31:00.002-05:00

Yep, the Jints are heading back to the Super Bowl to tarnish Tom Brady's stalled legacy all over again. Old news, I know.

But, what I wrote yesterday was spot-on...

The running games are about equal. Both defenses can bring a big pass rush with their front four. If the Giants take TE Vernon Davis out of the mix to a large degree, the 49ers wide receivers are not talented enough to pick up the slack.

The edge at quarterback has to go to Eli and the Giants. And I think the three-headed wide receiver beast--Nicks, Cruz & Manningham--are coming into their own and becoming too much for most any NFL secondary to handle for sixty minutes.

The 49ers had all of 12 completed passes during nearly five quarters of football. A whole 12. And they were distributed as follows...Gore 6-45, V.Davis 3-112, Walker 2-36, Crabtree 1-3.

So the Jints did not control Vernon Davis as I had hoped for, which adds them to a very long list of teams that could not. But, if you subtract the six receptions by the running back and the two receptions the other tight end managed, that leaves a whopping one reception coming from San Fran's inept, practically nebbish wide receivers. One.

In addition, the Giants' trio of wide receivers were just too much for that stout San Fran defense to handle. Actually, that defense played well enough, that defense deserved to go on to the Super Bowl.

So, to my persistent email hater, know that I have forgotten more about football than you will ever learn from your red-headed step-sister.

Oh, no! The Eagles signed away Steve Smith!

So, can that patchwork, that work-in-progress of a secondary up New England way handle the Giants' trio of wide receivers? It seems highly doubtful.

And if the striking parallels between the Jints' '07 and '11 seasons aren't eery enough already, know that Tommy the Ken Doll Brady is going to have his uniform dirtied and bloodied all over again, just like he last did in the '08 Super Bowl.

Somebody cue the music for Jintszilla.

On a whole other subject, I am not nor have I ever been a big fan of college football. In my damaged mind, college football is the minor leagues.

With that stated, I have never been a fan of Penn State football. Penn State, to me, always seemed kind of slow and plodding along. Almost a throwback to the days of black-and-white and leather helmets. Almost outdated.

But I always recognized and respected what Joe Paterno did for that institution and what he meant to that institution. And if I was a member of that board of trustees right about now, I'd have a very hard time looking at my despicable self in the mirror.

May he rest in peace, despite what Penn State did to him.

Sez me.

Later

Stadium Tribute

2012-01-22T11:15:00.003-05:00

The former haunt of the New York Football Giants...Later

Sunday morning musings

2012-01-22T10:20:00.001-05:00

Remember when we used to sneak wine sacks into events such as these? How times have changed when we’d be better served sneaking in some pepper spray. Or brass knuckles.

Candlestick Park security plan includes cops posing as Giants fans

If it were a TV show, maybe it would be called SFPD Blue.

That plan to beef up security for Sunday’s NFC title game at Candlestick Park, which for a change has less to do with preventing folks with bombs or guns or other assorted weapons into the building, includes a fascinating wrinkle.

In order to ensure that fans who choose to root for the Giants aren’t abused by 49ers fans who reportedly abused Saints fans last Saturday, undercover police officers will be posing as Giants fans.

And they say New Yorkers are a tough crowd. Jeez.

How in Allah’s name is this news? Again.

Travel costs since ’04 stun activists

WILKES-BARRE – One month before they voted to raise taxes 31 percent in 2008, three city council members and the city controller spent five days in Orlando, Fla. on a taxpayer-funded trip that cost more than $3,000 in hotel fees alone.

The trip to the annual convention of the National League of Cities was among dozens of excursions city council members and other city officials have taken over the past seven years that have cost taxpayers more than $113,000 in hotel and conference fees, according to a review of credit card statements of four city officials from 2004 to 2011.

If some of us were being honest, we’d chill with the feigned outrage. These travel expenses have been budgeted year-in and year-out, and year-in and year-out somebody makes it into an issue.

I fail to see how a $10,000 expenditure is so offensive as part of a $33 million budget. And when I see that people are questioning the effectiveness of attending seminars and the like, I scoff at them for underestimating the necessity of continuing education as well as the value of picking the brains of one’s peers. Been there, done that, and it’s usually well worth the cost.

Must be a really slow right-to-know week, heyna?

Here’s the obvious solution to this non-problem, this trumped-up bullspit: The $10,000 normally put aside for the trips goes to more productive uses, like, um, like buying some nifty new recycling containers. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Can’t have enough commingling containers, can we?

Or maybe we can resume the much-complained about Diamond Drops on New Year’s Eve. Yeah, we can congregate there in front of all of the businesses that closed only hours before, drink way too much when nobody is looking and get ourselves a case of frostbite. Yeah, that will show those no good council sumbitches!

It’s interesting that even though we have had significant turnover on city council, with three of the five members being new to the redundant fray, we are still demonizing city council.

Seems like the so-called “activists” won’t be content until they wrest control, install their myopic ways and plunge the city into another round of financial paralysis.

Seems like it.

Okay, Bill. You asked, so here it is.

The New York Football Giants at the San Franfreako 49ers.

The running games are about equal. Both defenses can bring a big pass rush with their front four. If the Giants take TE Vernon Davis out of the mix to a large degree, the 49ers wide receivers are not talented enough to pick up the slack.

The edge at quarterback has to go to Eli and the Giants. And I think the three-headed wide receiver beast--Nicks, Cruz & Manningham--are coming into their own and becoming too much for most any NFL secondary to handle for sixty minutes.

If the O-line protects Eli, the Jints win handily. If they do not protect Eli, all bets are off.

Either way, I will not be disappointed. We took a 7-7 triage unit and fought our way to the NFC championship game. And it’s hard to bitch about that, no matter where it ends.

With that said, I wonder what doubts would run through Tom (Ken Doll) Brady’s mind if he ended up in a Super Bowl rematch with these Jints who ruined his perfect season not so long ago.

We shall see.

Later

S.U.S.

2012-01-20T18:45:00.000-05:00

I loved the punk band Ruts the Crack when they, ahem, broke out in 1979.

Their so-called hit at the time was "Babylon's Burning". But "S.U.S.," British for, "Search under Suspicion," had me doing my level best to damage my hearing beyond repair.

Search under Suspicion? It's a cop thing loosely translated as making up a reason to thump somebody.

2007

1979

Later

Peter Schilling? Say it ain't so!

2012-01-20T18:14:00.001-05:00

My brother Ray (1970-2007) was a dyed-in-the-wool metal-head.

Whether it was Metallica, Megadeath, Guns 'n Roses or Judas Priest, he rocked by the simple creedo "If it ain't loud, it ain't worth a fu>k." Something, by the way, that I, his father/brother had instilled in him.

Yet, when I bought my first computer back in '96 and showed him how easy it was to file-share and burn music to discs, he begged me to burn the following song that practically brought him to tears when he heard it after all the years had passed since it was released in the early '80s.

2010

1983

I busted his stones, of course. But I never asked him what his emotional attachment was to this song. And, unfortunately, I'll never get a chance to ask him.

So for that reason, I now find myself emotionally-attached to said song. And I'm not even sure as to why.

Whatever.

Later

SOPA Cabana

2012-01-18T18:36:00.000-05:00

Actually, the Internet was much more fun back in the day before the maximum commercialization and the bum's rush towards regulation and taxation.

Later

New VH

2012-01-17T18:46:00.001-05:00

The new Van Halen CD--A Different Kind of Truth--will hit the Gallery of Sound stores on February 7.

After a 16-year hiatus, David Lee Roth is back on vocals. And Eddie's son Wolfgang is the new bass player.

The new tour starts in Philadelphia, and I'd bet the tickets are selling briskly. Between Roth's showmanship and Eddie's guitar pyrotechnics, they are to big rock shows what Obama is to piling up big debts.

Still and all, I still wish Patty Smythe had accepted Eddie's long ago offer to front the band.

If only.

Blue Cheese(heads)

2012-01-16T17:49:00.000-05:00

Gee, last night was a ton of fun.

Yes, despite the one-sided officiating, the defending champion Green Bay Packers got their asses handed to them by way of a Giants-supplied blowout.

It got so bad during the second half, much to his shock and dismay, Aaron "Double Check" Rodgers even dirtied his uniform...a first during all of the 2011 season. True, I swear.

Warning: This first video contains launguage not suitable for an Aaron Rodgers commercial. But it does give you an inkling of how most Giants fans felt going into yesterday's game.

This video, from Sports Illustrated, is as safe and pure as the wind-driven show in Green Bay.

Later

Hail Mary

2012-01-15T20:09:00.002-05:00

"Discount Double Check" my ass!

Better luck next year.

Later

Pack vs. Jints

2012-01-15T13:00:00.000-05:00

If you feel the need to fight Giants fans, there are probable better venues in which to start said fight...

Oh, and fu>k the Green Bay Packers. Going back to the NFL's inception in 1921, which team has more championships? And which team has more Super Bowl wins?

Later

September flood video

2012-01-15T12:29:00.000-05:00

Compelling video footage of the temporary flood barrier at the Market Street bridge in Wilkes-Barre giving it up to the river.

From Scott Spinucci/Wilkes-Barre TV...

Maybe next time.

Later

Exclusive

2012-01-15T11:49:00.002-05:00

Secret video culled from the January 2, 2012, Luzerne County Council meeting.

Later

Cheap stuff

2012-01-13T17:41:00.000-05:00

Folks, if you're looking for major league sports apparel, you need to take a look at this...

House of Deals 570

I was there. No, it's not a brick-and-mortar store. I was there at the local dude's house. Sharp looking stuff and very, very affordable. Oh, and very cluttered.

Really cool Jints stuff, too.

Later

D.S.S.com

2012-01-13T17:32:00.000-05:00

Take the full tour...

Dirty Spending Secrets (Washington liberals don't want you to know...)

U.S. tax dollars are spent on Chinese prostitutes? Outrageous! To tell with those foreign whores. Our dollars should be spent on our own prostitutes!

Later

Dead People on Parade

2012-01-13T17:26:00.000-05:00

I'd say the Democrats, who fight every attempt at verifying identities at the polls, now have egg where their two faces used to be.

James O’Keefe Video Purports to Show Ease of Voter Fraud in N.H. Primary

Purports?

The accompanying comments: Donate to projectveritas.com On January 10th, Project Veritas reporters walked into New Hampshire Polling Locations during the Presidential Primaries, saying dead people's names. We stated the name of a dead person we got from the NH obituaries. The names of the deceased were both Registered Republican and Democrats And in almost every case, saying a dead person's name, we were handed a ballot to cast a vote. We used no misrepresentation and no false pretenses. in fact, in almost every case, we insisted we show ID and they insisted that we vote without showing ID. Thanks to DailyCaller.com for breaking story.

Fun, er, scary stuff.

Later

2012-01-12T18:37:00.000-05:00

Last year could only be categorized as the year of hellacious weather and disasters here in Northeastern Pennsylvania.

We had a freaking man-made earthquake, a tropical storm, a hurricane, a flood of historic proportions and the Philthydumpia Eagles.

So the way we're going, I figure this thing will suddenly appear in the Nord End sometime this year...

Video by Gort

Later

Stone-ageistan, American Style

2012-01-12T18:22:00.000-05:00

Does anybody see any actual peeing going on?

Later

Class Warriors or: Dingleberries R U

2012-01-11T19:40:00.000-05:00

Nobody sends email anymore, except for this guy who used the tired “more fortunate” line on me because I have a career, a pile of really cool toys and seemingly because I‘m more than happy in my fast-wrinkling skin.

I hear this well-worn gibberish every single day on talk radio, and repeated by vapid, class-baiting politicians and less than original, easily-led bloggers: “You’re more fortunate than some others.”

Pest Control Technology magazine listed me as a top-four finalist for its 2010 Termite Technician of the Year award. And wait for it…top-four throughout all of North America. And my employer named me as it’s termite tech of the year winner for 2010, an honor that had never been bestowed upon any tech employed by my district.

Now, when you consider the training, retraining, state testing, manufacturer testing, periodic company testing, mandated continuing education, regional conferences, seminars and work-related injuries I’ve had to quietly endure; I will not and can not call myself lucky. And let us not forget the years, the tens of thousands of hours of hands-on experience I have amassed.

My employer, rated as “America’s Finest” by Pest Control Technology magazine put me in a position to succeed. They have invested heavily in my continuing training as well as my continuing education. And succeed I did.

I’m real good at what I do. Some say the best. You don’t pay me for chemicals, you pay me for expertise. I’m not fortuitous, I’m just flat-out good. So, please, spare me the class warfare drivel.

In addition, I’m not some heartless republican boob, as many Democrats like to paint the political opposition as.

During my formative years, I did the welfare and the subsidized housing bit. I’m not saying I liked it much, but it did teach me how to develop a serious work ethic, as well as be as mean as I felt I had to be when anyone looked down on me or mine. I was mean because we did not seek out poverty and the perceived freebies as too many mistakenly assumed, we were dumped into poverty by absentee fathers.

I know what it’s like to grow up on the then-economy brand substandard foodstuffs, government surplus cheese and powdered milk. Despite the rage that simmered inside of me, I had to endure the not-so-hushed comments when my mom produced her food stamp booklets at the check-out aisle. Trust me, I did’t do indignity very well.

We did the bulk of our shopping at Kresge's, McCrory's and at church rummage sales. Until I got hired at Percy Brown's, the great majority of my wardrobe consisted of hand-me-downs. We had no wheels. When we needed to get somewhere, we set out of foot. And that included carrying groceries from the supermarket all the way home.

I was embarrassed by the free lunch coupons in junior high to the point of not redeeming them. That‘s, skipping lunch altogether. (And they wonder why I skipped out for some Kresge’s pizza once Percy A. Brown & Co. put a decent jingle in my formerly empty pockets by age 14.) And I hate what being broke, worried and always figuring out how to get by until the next meager check arrived did to my mom. Basically, it wore her out. And she checked out at 49.

Trust me, I know some people are less fortunate. And having been there and done that, in most cases, I even know why. But don’t ever presume to tell me that I am, or have been “more fortunate” than anyone else. Good or bad, I am what I am because I made myself into what I am.

And I’ll give you a big heads up: The only way to escape poverty’s white-knuckled clutches is by forever chasing a buck. By developing that serious work ethic. By busting your ball bearings, even when you’re tired, even when you don’t have a ride or even when it’s inconvenient beyond all get-out.

And that’s exactly what I don’t see coming from the vast majority of those who would cry poverty today.

As Francis Vincent Zappa once said, “You are what you is.” As in, “less fortunate” for lack of any sustained effort.

Piss me off!!!

Blessed are they who win

2012-01-11T17:02:00.000-05:00

I think this is starting to get out of hand.

1985's St. Elmo's Fire reworked into Tim Tebow's Fire?

If Timmy & the Broncos take out Ken Doll & the Patriots, I'll take my place in a pew the following Sunday morning.

Later

Saint Tebow?

2012-01-10T18:16:00.000-05:00

This first video is pretty funny stuff, which is a complete surprise coming from long-suffering Saturday Night Live.

But this one, this one smacks of a sign from, a sign from, a...

Okay, self-impressed atheists. Explain that one away.

Later

Busted my ya-yas on this one

2012-01-09T21:41:00.000-05:00

This one kind of pissed me off after I posted it.

If any local media outlet had posted this many behind-the-scenes pictures, they would have been confidently waiting for a photo/journalism award.

But, you know, bloggers blow and deserve no such awards. Oh, and they have no recourse when the decorated journalists continually rip them off.

You gotta love the canopy picture right there in the beginning. High noon on a sunny Saturday. One person on the first block of South Main Street. One. One.

One!

Later

Bikeabout pics

2012-01-09T20:57:00.000-05:00

This video begins and ends with pictures I took of my grandparents' North Washington Street home being torn down.

I was heartbroken when my well-heeled uncle wrestled control of the old homestead from my mother. And I was besides myself dangerously angry when he paid to have it torn down.

Family shouldn't screw family, no?

Like I said, too tough to cry.

Later

Jeez. Did I do that?

2012-01-09T20:31:00.000-05:00

If I'm willing to post this crazed swill again, you know the end must be near.

Note the finger, critics.

Later

9/11: What We Saw

2012-01-09T19:39:00.000-05:00

With my made-for-TV-movie of a boyhood behind me, I've always prided myself on the fact that I'm just too tough to cry.

Tonight, that was put to the test.

G'nite

Only in Wilkes-Barre

2012-01-09T16:36:00.000-05:00

Here it is, kiddies…the latest non-smoking gun.

Million-dollar mystery in Wilkes-Barre

It's the million-dollar mystery.

More than five years ago, Wilkes-Barre Mayor Tom Leighton led city residents to believe money from a grant, the city's general fund, community development coffers and emergency services tax bankrolled the $860,000 purchase of three new fire engines.

In reality, an anonymous donor stepped forward with a $1 million gift specifically earmarked for the new fire equipment, according to interviews with city officials and documents reviewed by The Citizens' Voice.

We have reached the point of political activism gone gluttony, the point of absurdity, wherein the right-to-know hunt for the smoking gun in Wilkes-Barre has gotten old. And stale. And tired. And surprisingly annoying. Sorry, but that’s where I’m at.

I often wonder to myself how Wilkes-Barre can continue to exist at all with the abject negativity on parade that somehow, stupidly passes as the political opposition.

An anonymous donor gave the city a huge stipend. And in the small minds of those who fancy themselves as kings, that is proof of corruption? I’ve typed it before and I’ll type it again…only in Wilkes-Barre.

Unlike the reporters in this city, my calls do not go unanswered. And I can tell you that the name of the anonymous donor is a name you would not recognize. It’s not a name tied to any corruption scandal, past or present or otherwise.

Why wasn’t the overly generous donation made public when it happened? Uh, I dunno. So as to not set the do-it-yourself forensic investigators, i.e., the frustrated and overzealous city republicans off on the exhaustive hunt for the self-centered, favoritism-seeking philanthropist?

And allow me to float this electronic balloon. If we had stuck with the status quo in this then-failing city, if we had not changed administrations, would that hefty donation have come our way in the first place?

Methinks not.

Think, people. Trust me, it doesn’t hurt none too much.

Later

During a previous life...

2012-01-09T15:17:00.002-05:00

I once made mention of the fact that my then-amazed brother swore that foul-mouthed chef Gordon Ramsay copied my act. After seeing Ramsay on TV, I asked Wifey, “Was I really that bad?” She answered in the affirmative. Yeah, I guess.

After 26 years, Friendly's closes its Dallas location

In 1983 I was transferred to that restaurant and charged with a mission: by any and all means possible, bring the out-of-control food cost back down where it should be.

After less than a week, I targeted the short order staff which did next to nothing according to specifications. And being my predictable self--vulgar and theatrical--I called out the kitchen manager right in front of his horrified minions. Well, that is, after I had smudged into his chest an undercooked burger that he had served to a customer.

Anyway, I brutalized this staff for months on end. And some members of that kitchen staff complained. Some quit. One even cried as he quit. And many complained to the general manager and also to his boss, the district manager, all of which I summarily dismissed with the cost of food still so incredibly out of whack.

Months passed. I was literally hated by most of the staff, many of which were complaining about me to the customers. And after the passage of those months, it finally occurred to me that the kitchen staff was vastly improved since first I set foot in this store. But the food cost didn’t budge from it’s lofty perch.

So one night, that kitchen manager (who’s respect and trust I had earned) and I grabbed two six-packs and set about spying on the store after it had closed for the night. Nothing.

So we tried it again the next night. And the next night. And then the night after that. Lo and behold, during the dead of night the back door swung open and the janitor proceeded to load cases of frozen food into his vehicle. Had his own key, he did. Food cost problem solved. Bang!!!

But when I thought back about all of the endless grief I treated that kitchen staff to, all I could think was, Oops! Sorry, guys. And girl. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Right?

And with that, I was off on my next improve-or-else mission: Edwardsville. Franklin’s culinary version of The Bronx/Fort Apache, where no manager ought dare tell the short orders what to do.

You don’t want to know about that carnage. The police reports are probably still on file, though.

Later

Unsportsmanlike Conduct

2012-01-09T11:58:00.000-05:00

I thought the Democrats did away with Christians.

Later

Safety Dance

2012-01-09T00:18:00.000-05:00

Defense wins...what was it again?

YEE-HAW!!!

Go Blue!

2012-01-08T12:53:00.000-05:00

I believe that following this Super Bowl, Tom Brady had to wash his uniform for the very first time.

Later

Home Rule: 1-week Report Card?

2012-01-08T11:31:00.002-05:00

How’s that Home Rule thing working out so far? That was the starter for yesterday’s drawn-out conversation. Circumlocution, you could call it.

Well, you’d think that after one week it’d be virtually impossible to draw anything close to conclusions, but I do have a few thoughts.

First of all, I’m surprised by all of the consternation concerning the rumored front runner for the county executive post. Did we really believe that we’d search the world over and find a perfect candidate for the appointment? I never thought we would, unless we managed to fill the ear of someone who loves a challenge.

And those people do exist. I remember from my restaurant days that there is no quicker route to stardom than assuming control of a under performing store and turning it around. Taking control of a store that is achieving or exceeding expectations and continuing those profitable ways only proves that you are as capable as the previous general manager.

Getting back to the so-called front runner for the executive post, his employment track record is some cause for concern in that he seems to change jobs about as often as I change the filter in my coffeemaker.

Another serious cause for concern is the fact that the county council seems to have split into two rival factions…the Urbans and everybody else. So far, it seems as if Pop and Junior have their own agendas.

And I wholeheartedly disagree with Pop’s assertion that we should have put more emphasis on recruiting a local to fill the executive seat. By bringing in an outsider, at least the ages-old party politics, past allegiances and the behind-the-scenes power brokers will lose their grips on Luzerne County governance. At least, I hope.

I did not agree with the council’s decision to keep the process of recruiting an executive behind closed doors. Sorry, but I was told that this switch to Home Rule would bring with it a transparency in government where none existed before. And with secrecy being it’s first official overt ( or covert) act, council did not fill me with optimism going forward.

I once asked Councilman Harry Haas what his favorite color was? His response? Transparency.

Exactly! That’s what the populace of this county needs and expects. And I would not only remind him, but all of the 11 people we now look to for open and honest governing that more than anything, we need and deserve some transparency for the first time in our troubled history.

Still, we need to be remindful of the fact that this transitional period should prove to be messy considering that the outgoing commissioners did their level best to make it messy by saddling us with a 2012 budget that reeks of sabotage.

So, how’s that Home Rule thing working out so far?

To definitively answer that question would be akin to bemoaning an individual’s lack of accomplishments despite their obvious infancy.

We’ve only got a week by which to judge the state of things. But I would go as far to say that by having an 11-person council of people who seem to refuse to be on the same page, at least initially, I am troubled more than I thought I would be at this early stage of the revolution.

Remonstrance? Hell, at this point I’d settle for sanity tinged with some civility.

Later

Dumb All Over

2012-01-07T19:28:00.000-05:00

To a president who mistakenly thought Arab Spring was a good thing, and who is still working to bring an Arab Spring to Syria, I offer the following video which was posted, by me, on July 28, 2006.

If you enable religious fanatics in any way, death, destruction and untold suffering is sure to follow.

So it is written.

Later

The Argument for Palin

2012-01-07T18:20:00.000-05:00

Warning: Grandma might not approve of some of the language.

Later

Moonbats for Paul

2012-01-07T18:05:00.000-05:00

Apparently, Ron Paul's vociferous supporters are to moonbattery what the candidate is himself.

Sanctioned or not, this attack on John Huntsman (including his adopted daughters) goes way, way, way overboard.

Later

The Oblahblah Song

2012-01-07T15:43:00.003-05:00

As many of you know, I am an avid bicyclist.

If you remember correctly, during his presidency, Dubya was endlessly mocked, scorned and ridiculed whenever pictures of him riding his mountain bike were published. And I never understood why a guy would be castigated by mostly panty-wastes for riding a mountain bike off-road. I mean, could they do it? No? That's what I thought.

Then, when Jesus H. Soreto (or whatever his name is) took office, I spied a picture of him riding his glorified tricycle on the streets of Chicago and damn near choked to death on my ill-timed swig of Diet Coke.

And at that very moment, this old Dr. Demento classic came flashing across my brain.

Hard to argue that.

Later

"Agnes" film trailer

2012-01-06T10:17:00.004-05:00

Amazing video of the Wyoming Valley during and after the 1972 flooding, particularly of downtown Wilkes-Barre. Running time is 7:39.

"Agnes" film trailer

Enjoy

Colorado: Proprietary My A$$

2012-01-06T09:02:00.002-05:00

Since this was posted at FOX News, I figure most of you leftists (quasi commies) missed it.

Colorado Takes the Lead in Fracking Regulation

With a top government scientist calling for more research into the possible health effects of hydraulic fracturing, Colorado has enacted the toughest fracking disclosure rules in the country.

Companies have been reluctant to reveal exactly what those chemicals they are for fear that competitors will copy what they consider proprietary secrets.

Under an agreement brokered by Colorado Gov. John Hickenlooper energy companies have agreed to disclose to the public at least the chemical family of each chemical they use. The disclosure must be made within two months on an independent internet database: FracFocus.org. Anyone can go to the site to look up chemicals used in the fracking of virtually any well in the state of Colorado. Representatives from both the energy industry and environmental groups who were involved in the negotiations credit Hickenlooper, a Democrat and businessman who once worked as a geologist in the energy industry, with bringing the two sides together.

Later

Fracking & Earthquakes: Cause and Effect?

2012-01-05T17:02:00.010-05:00

I am not a geologist, nor do I play one on TV. But this stuff has my interest piqued and then some.

What You Need to Know About Earthquakes and Fracking

“Well, we look at the evidence. Youngstown is an area which doesn’t have a history of earthquakes. This disposal well started operating in December of 2010. Three months later, the earthquakes began and the earthquakes are trickling along. From March to November, you have nine earthquakes, all of a similar size, 2.5, 2.1, 2.7.

On Christmas Eve, there was a magnitude 2.7 earthquake. Our location of that Christmas Eve earthquake was about one kilometer from the bottom of the well and the location of the earthquake was sufficient evidence that there could be a link.”

CBS NEWS VIDEO...

Interesting reading...

After Earthquakes, Ohio Decides To Stop Fracking Process To ‘Help Stop The Ground From Shaking’
Ohio Earthquake Likely Caused by Fracking Wastewater
Youngstown Rocks: Is Fracking Causing Earthquakes in Ohio?
The Link Between Cracking and Fracking

Local earthquake...

NEPA residents rattled by earthquake
Did Fracking Cause the Virginia Earthquake?

Must-see video: Earthquake in Virginia -- 3.1M @ "FRACKING" operation -- 37.200°N, 81.885°W

From Wilkes-Barre TV@YouTube…

Later

Cruzzzzz!!!

2012-01-02T17:20:00.006-05:00

Check the video. A ho-hum 3-yard out pattern goes for a 74-yard TD. Such is life with Victor Cruz on the field.

Right in the beginning, the following video shows a snippet of what we saw from the then undrafted rookie during the 2010 preseason. That said, he never made it onto the field during the 2010 regular season
During the run-up to this season, Eli Manning’s injured safety blanket, WR Steve Smith, took his sure-handed but unspectacular act to the Eagles. At the time, the football pundits said it was their modest gain and our huge loss.

My son reluctantly agreed, but I didn’t necessarily see it that way. I pictured WR Mario Manningham, WR Hakeem Nicks and Victor Cruz being too much for most any secondary to handle.

With Cruz compiling 1,536 of QB Eli Manning’s 4,933 passing yards (both Jints records), I’d say Victor Cruz’ emergence was exactly one season late.

Anyway, the multitudes of injured are returning. The oft-injured offensive line has now stabilized, as has the once-decimated defense. And with Cruz stretching the opposing defenses, this here 9-7 playoff team could be as dangerous as they want to be. I guess it's all up to offensive coordinator Kevin Gilbride, who Jints fans less-than-affectionately refer to as Kevin Kill-Drive.

First up: A southern dome team coming north to New York in January.

Here’s hoping it’s blustery and cold as a witches implant.

Later

NYG!

2012-01-02T01:10:00.000-05:00

Despite being a mash unit on both sides of the ball for most of the year, we took out both the Dream Team and America's Team.

Sweet!

The Knoxville grandrodents

2012-01-01T16:30:00.000-05:00

The Knoxville contingent of my family--Peace, Scott, Gage & Taylor--made it home safely yesterday. Yep, and Wifey has already started taking down the three metric tons of Christmas decorations.

For those of you who used to know Gage, he is now 10-years-old and starting to sprout in a vertical sense.

Taylor is now 8-years-old and always seems to have one eye on fashion.

My daughter Peace (No, I wasn't at Woodstock) is still a good kid, a great mom, but I can't speak to the wife part.

End family update.

Later

Top 45 Pics of 2011

2012-01-01T01:40:00.000-05:00

According to BuzzFeed, that is.

The 45 Most Powerful Images of 2011

Here's to hoping the Mayans were good with numbers.

Later

Swept Away flick

2011-12-30T22:21:00.000-05:00

One of my all-time faves.

A battle of the sexes. Class warfare. And a battle of differing ideologies.

Later

Promises, promises

2011-12-30T13:29:00.003-05:00

With our centuries-old commissioner form of county government mere hours away from being replaced, it seems we’re replacing corruption, nepotism and indifference with tumult, chaos and rancor.

The TL link: Urban may pass on county council seat

Luzerne County Commissioner Stephen A. Urban hinted Thursday that he may not be serving on the new home rule county council.

While discussing the 2012 county budget during the last commissioner meeting, Urban said he won’t vote to give the courts more funding “if I get sworn in as a council member.”

The CV link: Final meeting features send-offs, face-offs

WILKES-BARRE - After giving farewell comments at the final Luzerne County commissioners' meeting on Thursday, Commissioner Stephen A. Urban wouldn't say if he planned to serve on county council.
"We will find out Monday," Urban said.

Personally, I’m not buying it. The way I figure it, he’ll be at the courthouse bright and early on Monday, which would be a first for any Luzerne County commissioner ex or otherwise.

The troubling thing for me is that the voters rejected the commissioner form of government only to put one of the three commissioners in partial charge of the new form of government. Does that make any sense?

Not to me, it doesn’t.

During the transitional meetings, Urban has seemed to be the more-than-willing fly in the ointment at every single one. And because of that, here’s to hoping that he does bow out.

The new county council gets sworn-in Monday morning and then transitions into it’s first official meeting as a governing body. They need to pick the flies out of the ointment, appoint a county executive and begin to deal with the parting shot the three commissioners sent them by way of a make-believe 2012 budget.

There is sure to be plenty of the aforementioned tumult, chaos and rancor. Which is in no way an indictment on my part of those due to be sworn-in come Monday. But it seems as if there would be a helluva lot less rancor if the career politician in the group would just do as he suggested he might and walk away. We can only hope.

Either way, it’s sure to be a bumpy ride. So buckle up and pay even more attention than ever before.

I know I will.

Count on it.

Later

Fore!

2011-12-30T00:23:00.000-05:00

Mission accomplished: 18 rounds a day for three years.

One more year, er, one more excruciating year to go.

G'nite

"Occupy" Legos

2011-12-28T11:28:00.002-05:00

I bought a half-ton of Legos this month alone, but I missed this set...

Later

Where Only Sue & I Dare

2011-12-27T16:39:00.000-05:00

There are termites in the vent framing, you say?

No problemo. Let's have a look.

Soundtrack by Sue.

Later

Word Police!!!

2011-12-26T13:32:00.000-05:00

Is this, like, a politically correct thing to say?

Somebody call the increasingly rogue U.S. Justice Department and have this big meanie deported.

Buh-bye

Disturbing fire video

2011-12-26T13:03:00.000-05:00

The place: The Station night club, West Warwick, Rhode Island on February, 20, 2003.

100 people were killed after the on-stage pyrotechnics lit the place on fire. From the looks of the joint, it appears to be a somewhat aged wood-frame structure, not a structure you'd want to be lighting fireworks inside of.

The fire department arrives in less than five minutes, but still well too late to save much of anything or anyone. The point being, fire moves very quickly.

When the music stops, you can hear the singer say "Wow. That's not good."

Later

Three Grandrodents video

2011-12-26T12:53:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I know the quality sucks, so don't bother to comment on it. Just a moment in time, albeit, poorly done.

A couple of scattered thoughts on it. Surrounded by these screaming types, it's no wonder people drink.

Secondly, to the easily-led (henpecked) types, no, I do not turn off the NFL for any holiday. Not even Christmas.

Oh, and the Eagles bite!

Later

While visions of sugar plumbs dance in our heads...

2011-12-25T10:12:00.000-05:00

F-18 Hornets...

Later

Merry Christmas: Air Jordan war is over

2011-12-25T10:06:00.000-05:00

Makes me want to buy 50 remote acres, a used double-wide, a couple of sawed-off shotguns and some vicious junkyard dogs.

All for overpriced Air Jordans? You couldn't get me to act like that unless you were offering retro high-top Converse.

Oops!

Big Blue highlights

2011-12-25T09:22:00.000-05:00

I begged for this kid last season. But, no, we wouldn't want to play a freaking rookie.

Well, this kid just put up more receiving yards in one season than any receiver in Giants history dating back to 1921. What do I know.

Big mouth? Big belly? C’mon man! Tell us what you really think. Wait for it near the end.

Fun stuff.

Later

Merry Xmas: "...I'll punch him in the face"

2011-12-25T08:51:00.000-05:00

Turns out, I got everything I wanted for Christmas on Christmas Eve. In one fell swoop, the New York Football Giants managed to knock both the cross-town Jets and the Philthydumpia "Dream Team" Eagles from the playoffs. Now that's what I call going ("ground & pound" on) green!

Check this reported post-game exchange between Jint's running back Brandon Jacobs and Jets' motor-mouthed coach Rexomouthus Erectus...

Running back Brandon Jacobs said he had an exchange with Ryan after the game in which the coach approached him, used an expletive and said, "Wait till we win the Super Bowl."

Added Jacobs: "And I told him I'll punch him in the face. I told him out of all these Giants players on this team you're talking to the wrong one. And that was that."

Ryan acknowledged that he and Jacobs "had a private conversation. He doesn't like me; I respect him."

Ah, yes, Merry effing Christmas.

I managed to pull off a Sprawl-Mart free Christmas, something I'm very pleased about. Yep, no pepper spray, no sneaker riots and no hanging out with bad actors for this spirited shopper. My shopping was just about limited to K-Mart, Toys R Us and good ole Boscov's.

I enjoyed a brisk downtown walkabout early yesterday afternoon. In addition to Boscov's being very busy, Valley Seafood and the soup kitchen were likewise bombed. Anywho, I carried those two over sized shopping bags all the way home only to find that one of the bags had split and three boxes of Legos had gone AWOL on me. You know, those inexpensive Legos. As if!

We had the three local grandrodents over last night. The other two will be in route from Tennessee tomorrow morning. I talked to my sister on the phone yesterday, but she devolved into a sobbing mess when the dearly departed came up. I knew way back when that she'd never progress much past the grief stage when mom went away. But I never figured on my brother adding a double dose to her painful mix. Nothing I can do to change it.

Anyway, all is as well as it can be. I'm in for a quiet day of relaxation. And I hope anyone who has the misfortune of reading this can say the same.

Later

We all gotta duck...

2011-12-23T19:43:00.001-05:00

When the Obama sh*t hits the fan...

Aptly brought to you by the Circle Jerks.

"Punk rock will never die, it'll just smell funny."---Francis Vincent Zappa

Here, here

All I wanted was a Coke

2011-12-23T19:26:00.000-05:00

Missing mom and grandma during the holidays always gets me to reminiscing...

Hey Uncle Bud! Punching me around at their behest didn't help, did it?

Or did it?

See Spot run (from Dick)

2011-12-22T16:56:00.001-05:00

You've all seen those too-many-to-count Ad Council commercials by which the Fedrule Govmint wastes untold heaps of tax dollars on attempts at behavior modification.

Some were classics. Like Smokey the Bear. Or the Cryin' Injun. Ineffectual stuff like that.

If Smokey was effective, then why do fire investigators blame damn near every forest fire on careless smoking?

And if the entire world is so polluted that global warming is near irreversible, what did the ballin' injun really accomplish?

Did you know that the U.S. Treasury department bankrolled a commercial extolling the virtues of maintaining a good credit rating? No, I'm not making that up. Yes! The Fedrule Govmint--all $15 trillion in debt of it--has taken to lecturing the lowly likes of us about the importance of sound credit practices.

But this following video warning parents that their children may be exposed to Internet perversions takes the proverbial cake.

Yep, after having at the Internet completely unsupervised for too long, our kiddies might just start humping the puppies. This is your bloated government at work.

Yet, they claim there is nowhere in the massive budget where savings can be realized. And still others cry for even bigger government.

Gives new meaning to the phrase, See Spot run.

Arf!!!

Chiefie's bonanza?

2011-12-22T16:26:00.000-05:00

Are bloggers journalists?

Another question might be, since so many "journalists" have taken to blogging, are they still considered journalists protected by the "shield" laws?

A $2.5 Million Libel Judgment Brings the Question: Are Bloggers Journalists?

The excerpt:

‘Bloggers Beware’

That was the headline on a conservative blog following a $2.5 million judgment this month against blogger Crystal Cox in a defamation case tried in federal court in Oregon. It’s a case followed closely in both the blogosphere and in the traditional media, as it highlights the proliferation of blogging, the blurring of lines between journalists and bloggers and more libel cases born out of blog posts.

“There are a lot of malicious people out there,” says Bruce Johnson, a Seattle attorney with Davis Wright Tremaine and author of Washington state’s current Shield Law. “You’re not going to be able to get rid of them all. They will continue to basically write graffiti on the bathroom wall, and in this case, the Internet provides the bathroom wall,” says Johnson.

On a much more local note…

DessoyE-gate"

The excerpt:

Conclusion After carefully reviewing all of the material, it is my strong opinion that the following are true:

1) The Chief has had an adulterous affair with Catherine Meehan
2) The Chief drinks alcoholically (Word is you can't call him after 9 pm)
3) The Chief has been an adulterer and a serial cheater much of his life.
3) The Chief has been applying a "ring of protection" around Catherine's drug house
4) The Mayor has refused to respond to complaints made about this house.
5) Chief Dessoye has been using Catherine Meehan as his drug source (likely opiates/heroin).

Yikes!

Good luck with that.

Later

The Walk...

2011-12-17T17:05:00.000-05:00

...to Gas Stock.

'Member that?

Verizon-free

2011-12-17T15:05:00.078-05:00

A response to a comment followed by circumlocuting and then some.

Gort said...

This Youtube access must be a new venture for you sir.

No, fact is, my ages-old pissing match with Verizon which had me banned to the muddied killing fields of dial-up has come to a screeching halt. I'm loyal to a fault, but it's become obvious that Verizon views it's DSL landline customers much the the same way health care professionals view lepers.

I have a new DSL provider, I'm having some fun with some long-lost videos but, let us not forget that I was the first local blogger to embed a YouTube video, as well as the first local blogger to embed a video featuring original content. While I may not give a hoot about being cutting-edge these days, remember, there was a time when most of you were playing catch-up. In fact, all of you were bringing up the electronic rear-guard.

Check this video I posted after first-ever blogger soiree held at Mark's Pub.

12/15/2006

After the video, I posted a couple of pictures of the particpants. And I was quickly castigated by those very same participants for daring to reveal their identities. You see, it never occurred to me that those who would ramble on electronically, and those who would likeise gather in public would object to being outed. But some did object. So I deleted said video and said pictures.

Look, I apologize if my output of late has been boring. I never thought of any of it as being boring, but I've been punched in the head a couple of hundred times too many.

In Washington, a charlatan is leading us to financial ruin.

In Harrisburg, a new governor is leading us to dried-out watery tributaries as a way of filling his campaign coffers.

In Wilkes-Barre, an anorexic-looking Santa and her clueless elves think council meetings should be reduced to tired circus stunts.

In the local blog-a-rama, what once was the ultimate in citizen activism has now morphed into being the endless pursuit of celebrity.

Y'all can think whatever you want, but I see or feel no shame for retreating to the relative safety of great musical performances gone by.

Later

Mick Ronson

2011-12-15T20:34:00.000-05:00

Oh, and that David Blowie guy, too.

Believe it or not, Mick Ronson once played at the Kings College gym, while helping to front Ian Hunter's reformed Mott the Hoople.

I'd say that makes the Kings gym hallowed ground.

At least, I'd say.

Phantom of the Park

2011-12-15T20:11:00.002-05:00

KISS!!!

The Fab Four

2011-12-15T19:58:00.000-05:00

The Rutles...

New York Dolls give birth to punk

2011-12-14T17:54:00.000-05:00

Freaked, I did.

Blondie goes Goldfinger

2011-12-14T17:25:00.003-05:00

One of my favorite movies of all time is Goldfinger, the gold standard of James Bond Movies.

I watched it for the first time in the cheap seats positioned directly in front of the Sandy Beach drive-in screen shortly after it was released, and I've watched it every chance I've gotten ever since then.

In my mind, Sean Connery was James Bond, and all of those who came after him were not worthy.

But that Goldfinger theme, that haunting theme as it was, has never once escaped from my limitless musical conscience.

Hubba, hubba!

Sparks: All you ever think about is sex

2011-12-13T20:13:00.000-05:00

This ancient video is unique.

By the way, Sparks was always fun.

After seeing it again after all these years, I'm thinking this is what a Wilkes-Barre City Council meeting would be like if the hapless but, beaten back insurgents ultimately persisted and had their way.

Later

Paul WIlliams: The Hell of It

2011-12-13T19:55:00.000-05:00

From the 1974 cult non-classic "Phantom of the Paradise."

I don't know about y'all, but I love it.

RANT!

2011-12-12T22:17:00.000-05:00

The long and loud version of...535 jackasses plus two.

Whew!

Volkswaffe

2011-12-11T17:38:00.000-05:00

Who knew?

The next LT?

2011-12-11T13:15:00.000-05:00

It'll never happen.

Never

Moment of Clarity

2011-12-11T01:28:00.001-05:00

Necessary reading for the Occupussies who think I should pay for their, ahem, "education."

Moment of Clarity

The website www.payscale.com lists the median starting pay and median mid-career pay for 125 common bachelor degrees. Petroleum engineers start at $97,000 while elementary education majors start at $29,000. No wonder the world’s social scientists hate big oil.
High school seniors, pay attention here - the top-paying bachelor degrees in order are: petroleum engineering, chemical engineering, electrical engineering, materials science, aerospace engineering, computer engineering, physics, applied mathematics, computer science, and nuclear engineering.

And the worst-paying degrees in order are: child and family studies, social work, elementary education, culinary arts, special education, recreation and leisure studies, physical education, public health, theology, and art. The various ethnic and gender studies majors are not even listed separately as there is no market for them.

Going on to graduate school will not fix a low-paying degree choice, either. According to Forbes Magazine, the worst master’s degrees for employment (job availability and pay) in order are: music, history, divinity, English, psychology, social work, library science, counseling, education, and chemistry.

So if your goal is to get the best return on your investment in post-secondary education, then start out taking your math and science foundations at a two-year college and then transfer to the cheapest four-year college that offers a degree in Petroleum Engineering. You will spend less than $30,000 for a credential that carries a $97,000 median starting pay. Ask a business major (#58) to explain ROI to you.

You are what you made it. Now suck on it.

Bye

Stigma? What Stigma?

2011-12-09T19:56:00.000-05:00

Private Sector?

Jobs? Self-reliance? Dogged individualism? Toughness? Freedom?

Antiquated concepts, all!

Vote for me. I'll put Ramen noodles and government surplus horse meat in every Rent-A-Center supplied pot.

Sign up today!

Wilkes-Barre Racing

2011-12-09T19:12:00.000-05:00

Take a look.

Wilkes-Barre Racing

Interested?

Take the Tour

Later

EPA: Oops! Don't drink the water

2011-12-08T17:27:00.000-05:00

Go frickin' figure.

From USAToday.com: EPA: Fracking may cause groundwater pollution

The excerpt:

CHEYENNE, Wyo. – (AP) — The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency announced Thursday for the first time that fracking — a controversial method of improving the productivity of oil and gas wells — may be to blame for causing groundwater pollution.

But remember, the gas-drilling outfits are good, good neighbors throwing good money to local charities and for event sponsorships.

Whatever.

Drawdown through Kuwait

2011-12-08T00:00:00.002-05:00

'Bout time.

Warthog

2011-12-07T23:45:00.000-05:00

Warning: Language

Wall Street on Trial

2011-12-06T18:37:00.001-05:00

Dead-on accurate...

The latest video from Andrew Klavan on the Occutards

Welcome to Obama World, where nobody does anything and everybody is entitled to something.

Romney? Gingrich? Paul? Doesn't matter when PeeWee Herman would make for a dramatic upgrade.

Sez me.

G'nite

Aged papers

2011-12-05T18:22:00.000-05:00

When Grandma passed away quite unexpectedly (at least to me), we found while rooting through her most personal of things that she had saved a copy of the Times Leader (or Times Record...I forget) dated December 8, 1941. At that time, that yellowed newspaper was 39-years-old.

I wanted it. So did my Mom. And that turned out to be the only thing she not only laid claim to, but that she had taken from the abode after Gram's funeral.

After my Mom passed away at age 49, I took possession of that aged newspaper, which was then 47-years old. Much like her mom before her, my mom saved a newspaper from what she considered to be the seminal moment of her lifetime, a Times Leader dated November 23, 1963.

Even though I was a 5-year-old in kindergarten, I remember the day Kennedy was assassinated simply because my mom stared at the reports on the TV and cried all day long. And simply put, I wanted to watch some Bowery Boys, Little Rascals, or Mighty Mouse.

And while I still have the Pearl Harbor and JFK newspapers, I've added a copy of the Challenger disaster print reporting, as well as the papers from 9-11. Oh, and that Pearl Harbor paper is now 70-years-old.

When I was a sprat, we would kill marauding make-believe "Japs" in the back yard. All these years later, I've got no quarrel with any of them. But I've still got that newspaper. Weird.

Later

Herman Cain's 'Ode to Pizza'

2011-12-05T06:37:00.000-05:00

Don't quit your day job.

Oh, that's right. He already did.

It's been all downhill since...

2011-12-04T23:18:00.000-05:00

Since FZ moved on.

Girl, you thought he was a man but...

The greatest?

2011-12-04T22:26:00.000-05:00

Maybe?

Patty

2011-12-04T21:57:00.000-05:00

Ah, Patty.

Patty. Yum, yum.

If only.

Dolls

2011-12-04T21:54:00.000-05:00

Yikes!

Made me move past Chicago's brass.

Bang!

Home Rule austerity

2011-12-04T11:25:00.003-05:00

Now that the voters of Luzerne County have gone and replaced their three red ink-stained commissioners with a home rule government, now the soon-to-be-departed commissioners are pitching cutbacks, layoffs and a quasi balanced budget.

Yes, with upwards of 18% of the operating budget devoted to debt service payments, with revenues shrinking and costs soaring, this budgetary cycle is no different than those that preceded it.

But, now that home rule is but days away from taking effect, now…now our commissioners are dead-set against more property tax increases, additional bond debt or the selling of county properties.

Nope. Now that the voters have given the commissioners an unceremonious heave-ho, now the commissioners have embraced sabotage as a form of fiscal responsibility.

Subterfuge, baby.

So the Feds are investigating City Vest’s mishandling of the $6 million the County had loaned to it.

$6 million was spent with little to show for it, the hulking Hotel Sterling is waiting on a wrecking ball and irate people are demanding answers. And while that’s all well and good and such, I expect that the grand jury will find no evidence of malfeasance.

Incompetence? Sure. Criminality? I doubt it.

Sure, I’ve heard all of the incessant rumblings on WILK…the rumors, the second-hand stories and the regurgitated suspicions. But here’s the scoop, you oft-enraged conspiracy theorists…

Try as you may, you cannot will the next round of corruption arrests and the like. There’s either corruption afoot, or there isn’t. And the tired attempts to create corruption out of thin air are starting to get very old.

Tear it down and move on to the next less than evidential right-to-know nugget.

Now that UGI has announced that natural gas rates will be reduced by 9%, do you suppose that the great majority of the anti-fracking noise will be muted?

Methinks.

No, he’s not a ‘tax and spend’ liberal. He’s a spend, spend and spend liberal.

What do you think of a guy who won’t post his name or his picture on his site, but he will post a picture of one of the mayor’s kids?

Time for some more horrendous hits on 'defenseless receivers.'

Later

Benzene? It can't happen here

2011-12-01T19:05:00.000-05:00

From ProPublica.com…

Company Backs out of $45 Million Deal to Buy Troubled Wyoming Gas Field

A deal to sell a controversial central Wyoming natural gas field has fallen apart amidst allegations that drilling there has caused water pollution.

Texas-based Legacy Resources backed out of a $45 million deal to buy the field near Pavillion, Wyom., from EnCana last week, soon after the Environmental Protection Agency said it had detected cancer-causing benzene at 50 times the level safe for humans and other carcinogenic pollutants during its latest round of sampling.
The cancelled sale could signal difficulty for companies trying to turn over aging gas fields if there are environmental or health concerns related to their operations.

********

The Scranton speech

2011-11-30T17:34:00.000-05:00

So, President Soreto brought the fleet of jets, the fleet of vehicles, the mobile hospital and the division-strength compliment of Secret Service types in to Scranton and spoke to the adoring government employees and hard-core union wastes for a whopping 25 minutes. That's it?

Wow! What did that briefest of brief campaign stops cost the treasury?

Here's the text of his speech as I heard it on WILK...

People are hurting. And it's the fault of the GOP and the rich. I wanted to create jobs. But the GOP and the rich are blocking me. I want to cut your taxes. But the GOP and the rich won't let me. I can deliver you to utopia by tonight, but some people are not paying their fair share.

Okay, I was paraphrasing, but only a bit.

My favorite chortle came when he said, "We don't give up, we get back up!" to a roar from the crowd.

What I would say to him is, Barry, give it up so that America can climb back up.

With no record of achievement to run on, expect a steady of dose of the obfuscation and the class warfare until he's trounced next November.

What a pretender. What a charlatan.

Later

Iran not backing down

2011-11-29T18:32:00.000-05:00

Get ready, this is just the beginning of a much wider, much more encompassing conflict.

Iranian Students Storm British Embassy in Tehran

Student protesters loyal to the Iranian government stormed the British Embassy in Tehran and its residential compound on Tuesday, in a coordinated attack that underscored the volatile and unpredictable nature of Iran's politics both at home and abroad.

The raid, which Britain said caused significant damage to its property, was the most serious security breach of a diplomatic site in Iran since the takeover of the U.S. embassy in 1979.

Live television footage from Iran's state broadcaster showed angry mobs climbing on a wall of the British Embassy building in downtown Tehran and two young men attempting to break the lock on the iron gate of the compound. Demonstrators took down the Union Jack flag and raised Iran's, Iranian news media reported.

Later

NEPA Blogs: Worth the ether they are printed on

2011-11-29T18:03:00.000-05:00

First off, I finally relented by dumping dial-up in favor of the latest high-speed, 21 billion jigg-a-watt techno muckity muck.

Secondly, I went to PAHomePage.com (WBRE) and watched every available episode of NEPA Blogs’ “Blog of the Week”. And that’s when it occurred to me that, despite what some local radio talk show host might be saying to the contrary, we’ve got some pretty talented people occupying an electronic booth in the local blog scene. We really, really do.

Somehow, Gort, Michele and D.B. Harold have built NEPA Blogs into a weekly television show. A brief television show, but a television show nonetheless. Plus, there’s some sort of radio tie-in I know nothing about.

Speaking of Gort, he just snaps his magic fingers and politicians of practically every stripe are flying in to town to hang out at the BlogFest events.

He and The Yonk once made an appearance on WILK’s Sunday morning Pennsylvania affairs show (the name escapes me) with Rusty Steele. And they were once both regulars on WILK’s election day coverage until one of it’s self-important hosts decided that bloggers that were invited to appear needed to be berated and belittled on the air.

The Yonk stills makes occasional appearances on WILK, as well as appearing on Hazleton’s WYLN TV political shows.

Joe Valenti’s blog is mentioned every now and again on WILK, as well as in local print stories.

Fireman Dan proved beyond doubt that the Hotel Sterling is beyond repair.

Kayak Dude went toe-to-toe with our long-entrenched congressman over the debatable deflatable dam and defeated him. Nicest guy I know, but a motivated hard-ass when annoyed. Oh, and he proved that the quickest route from Point A to GasFest was a 14-mile meandering line.

Christ! Even a single-issue local blogger scored wall-to-wall television and print coverage by objecting to a manger.

If I’m forgetting someone, some movement or some event, please report to the back of the long line of mostly cowardly folks that want a piece of me.

Anyway, after repeatedly hearing on WILK that blogs are not worth the ether they are printed on, I see things quite differently. As in, it’s undeniable that we’ve got some talent out here in the vast electronic wastelands.

Later

Gov Christie unloads on the do-nothing prez

2011-11-29T16:14:00.000-05:00

Ouch!

The truth hurts, Barry.

Syria: Libya Part II?

2011-11-28T17:10:00.000-05:00

While the U.S, Israel, France, England and other NATO countries are conducting joint air force maneuvers in advance of an attack on Iran's hardened nuclear facilities, there is another lingering fire about to be doused with gasoline.

Israel, Jordan and Turkey all have their forces on a state of very high alert because of some serious saber-rattling on the part of Syria. Israel has already forward-deployed some of it's armor. Syria has been systematically killing it's own citizens who want a change of direction for their country. Oh, and Syria, as well as Russia rightly suspects that the U.S., NATO and Turkey are contemplating an Arab Spring sequel to the Libyan intervention.

The Russians, Syria's biggest military ally, have anchored three warships off the coast of Libya as a show of support. In addition, Russia's one and only aircraft carrier, the Admiral Kuznetsov is currently in route to Syrian waters.

Within days, the super carrier USS George H.W. Bush, 5 guided missile destroyers and 3 guided missile cruisers will all be posted just outside Syria's territorial borders at sea.

Folks, this one is a very problematic powder keg.

Many Americans freaked over Dubya's nation building. But this Arab Spring meddling at Oblahblah's behest is going to backfire on us in the worst of ways, and for decades to come. Egypt is coming unglued after our meddling. Libya will quickly follow suit. And if we push this short-sighted meddling as foreign policy into Syria, we're going to have high-velocity ordnance flying in every which direction with Russian warships sitting right in the middle of the sh*tstorm.

President Barry Soreto does not know what the hell he's doing, and Vladimir Putin is not a man he should be playing brinkmanship with. Anyway, this fast-developing showdown should worry you.

Later

Reminds me of the Eagles' season

2011-11-28T16:23:00.000-05:00

Then again, it reminds me of the big, bad insurgency to topple Mayor Leighton.

LiveLeak.com - Escalator was not created for all!

Later

NFL factoid #1

2011-11-27T23:49:00.000-05:00

Football factoid time...

The much-maligned, oft-mocked and always belittled Bible-thumping Denver Broncos' QB Tim Tebow now has more NFL wins under his belt than does that flailing "Dream Team" from Philthydumpia.

I love it.

Bye, Andy. Buh-bye.

G'nite

Turkey Day 2004

2011-11-25T21:29:00.002-05:00

Turns out, thanks to a heads-up from a family member, I do have a Thanksgiving scribbling to share (or re-share) with all of you unsuspecting victims.

From Wilkes-Barre Online, November 25, 2004:

Road trip!

My brother and I took a ride to Connecticut yesterday. Well, for the purposes of this exercise, let's identify him as being my step-brother. Us step-siblings have never used that "step" word. We grew up together and suffered through all sorts of struggles together, so we never thought of each other as "step" anything.

Anywhooey, my step-dad is getting on in years and can no longer handle his pick-up truck that he described as being "very, very high." He told my brother he'd sign it over to him for one dollar if we'd make the trip to Ansonia, where he now resides. So we loaded up the car, and we headed to Ansonia.

Step-dad, Leo, and my mom separated so many times, I could navigate the trip from Connecticut to Wilkes-Barre, or vice versa, around the time I was eight years-old. And that was before Route 84 was anywhere near being completed. My job was to get us from Thompson Street to Woodlawn Street, and point out the nifty landmarks of historical importance that had anything to do with our family way back when. It was a fun trip for the both of us.

It was a straight shot other than one bathroom/gasoline stop in Newburgh, New York. I stopped there on purpose so that Ray could take a gander at Stewart Air Force base. He was amazed. He had never seen a C-130 before, or a fighter jet screaming overhead, for that matter. We hit some miniatured "gas 'n' go" type mini-mart so popular in that neck of the woods. Ray pumped the gas, and I headed inside to visit the inattentive Pakistani f**k behind the counter. I quickly realized that TastyKakes were not on these shelves and grabbed two boxes of "Mike 'n' Ikes" for Gage Andrew. I approached the counter and it started. I remember this circle-jerk, foreigner bullspit all too well from my trucking days.

F**k: "You pay for gaz."
MC: "No, he's (pointing outside) paying for the gas."
F**k: "Gaz hass be paid."
MC: (Pointing again) "He's paying for the gas. I'm paying for the candy."
F**k: "Gaz. Who pay gaz?"
MC: "HE IS!"
F**k: "Gaz separit?"
MC: "Yeah. Gas separate. He's got the gas."
F**k: "He pay gaz?"
MC: "He's paying for the f**king gas, you f**king idiot!!! Do you see how f**king big he is? Do you want me to tell him you don't f**king trust him? Do you? You f**kin' f**k?"
F**k: "Tree dollah plez."

And with that, the guy waiting patiently behind me started laughing.

And the moral of this very brief story? Sometimes you just gotta go "Serpico" on these immigrant numbnuts. Sez me.

Ray paid for the gas and we bid numbnuts adieu. We motored across the Newburgh Bridge, and before you know it, we were being welcomed to Connecticut by a sign. I did notice that the weigh station at Danbury was closed. Where in the hell was that when I was truckin' through here every week? You'll never run across a more overzealous bunch that the Connecticut DOT. Whatever, man.

Traffic in the Danbury area was slowed to a crawl, but we eventually came across our exit and shot down Route 34 towards the old stomping grounds. With each passing mile, another near forgotten memory came eeking back into my mind from somewhere. We passed Zoar Beach, which was the site of my first ever serious injury requiring immediate medical attention. And we rolled past Indian Wells State Park on the opposite shore where my sister learned to swim one sunny afternoon circa 1968, or so.

This is a very weird story.

She was deathly afraid of large bodies of water, and no matter how they tried; Leo and my mom could not teach her to swim. At the time, this kinda twerked me off. I remember all too well when I first learned how to swim. Leo took me to the farthest point of the dock at Sandy Beach and tossed me into Harveys Lake. Swim or drown, boy! Step-dad's tend to go much easier on their "real" kids. Trust me on this.

So we were swimming and cooking out at Indian Wells some 35 years ago, and my sister would not even get her foot wet without carrying on like she had been repeatedly stabbed. Out of nowhere came this twenty-something guy, he somehow befriended her, and then took her in his arms and headed out into the river. Both Leo and my mom looked on intently, but they were not concerned in the least. Back in the sixties, pedophilia hadn't been invented just yet. It took the muscle-bound guy a couple of hours, but he stuck to it and had my sister swimming on her own. Her proud parents were more than appreciative and buried the guy in gooey verbal niceties. As dusk neared, we packed up the car, waved goodbye to the kind stranger and headed home.

Two days later, or thereabouts, I wandered into the house looking for a drink of water and found my mom crying while staring at a copy of the local newspaper, The Evening Sentinel. In a weird twist of fate, the kindest of strangers that finally taught Suzie to swim that day had drowned in those very same waters after we had gone home. That's not the kind of thing one ever forgets.

Finally, we arrived in downtown Derby. Ya'll remember going to a thriving downtown Wilkes-Barre with mom, or grandma, and so do I. But being that my boyhood years were split between two cities, I also remember what a bustling place downtown Derby was years ago. To say that it is a shell of it's former self would be giving it way too much credit. It's devastated. It's delapidated. It is beyond any possible repair. It's depressing. It's depressing to pass all of those crumbling buildings and remember all of the good times we had there so many years ago. Downtown Derby needs to be bulldozed, while the Home Depots and the Wal-Marts of the world have sprung up within spitting distance.

If you think downtown Wilkes-Barre has problems, you really need to see what has happened to Derby's downtown. Is anybody up for a road trip? I'll be your navigator. Well, for a nominal fee. Seriously. We didn't stop for pics, but to put things in perspective, consider the difference between a burned-out Yugo and a brand new Hummer. That's what we're talking about here. It's awful. And after seeing that wreckage, trust me, Wilkes-Barre's downtown offers much to build upon. We're in better shape than we knew.

I just had to drop by the old homestead and take a picture. While my mom was doing battle with Leo for years on end, we moved all over the place. But there was one adobe where we settled in for a few years, and during that relative time of tranquility, I was never happier as a boy. Whenever I harken back to my days at 124 Direnzio Heights, I remember how great that feeling of normality felt like. And it was good to know that Godzilla had spared the place after I escaped to Pennsylvania under the cover of darkness.

So we made this trip to Ansonia to pick up my brother's free truck. But the one thing Ray has learned over the years is that his dad is a bit goofy at times. I knew as much long before Ray was even born. And I've got the scars to prove it. Ray's biggest fear was that we'd drive all the way to Ansonia only to learn that the truck was in need of being crushed. And soon. His dad promised him that this truck was a keeper, but Ray had his doubts.

And as we pulled up in front of the senior high-rise where Leo now resides, we were confronted by a thoroughly beaten pick-up truck that looked as if Iraqi insurgents wouldn't waste an IED on it. It was a bondo-bomb for sure and it was leaning to one side.

Ray gave me that look that I know all too well that signals that someone was about to get hurt. And as always, when he is just about ready to explode and end someone's life, his neck begins to twitch. I reassured him. I told him that couldn't possibly be the truck Leo was talking about, and I crossed my fingers. If it was the truck in question, there was no doubt in my mind we were only minutes away from meeting most of the Ansonia police department.

Ray parked the car, we crossed the street and Leo appeared at the front door. I swallowed hard as I climbed the steps. As we neared the front door, Leo swung it open, pointed to a monster truck down the street a ways, and said, "What do you think?" Whew! No skirmishes with the cops on this monsoon of a day. Whew!

Turns out, the truck is a gem. A 1982 Ford F-250 with a four-barrel carburetor, and a newly rebuilt engine. It's got tires bigger than John Goodman, gigantic orange springs and metal steps leading up to the nosebleed seats in the cab. It's got a new cap, a Radio Shack CB and a narly car stereo. Leo had the keys in hand and gave us a quick tour. Ray looked as much relieved as he did happy.

I, of course, was really happy for Ray, but equally happy for Leo. I didn't travel back to Connecticut (back in time if you will) just to live through yet another ugly family incident after all of these years had passed. Ray more than approved of the monster truck and we headed indoors for a bit of paperwork.

And believe it or not, Leo pissed me off as soon as we entered the building. We encountered a rowdy bunch of senior chickies and Leo set about introducing us to them. He referred to Ray as being his son, and he referred to me as his step-son. I really didn't understand the need to make that distinction at this late stage of the game.

Wouldn't it have been much cooler on his part to just refer to the both of us as being his sons? Nah, many years ago, he made it crystal clear to me by the way he treated me that I was not his son. I guess some people can't turn it off no matter how much they are mellowed out by the aging process. Always the idiot, bastard step-kid. No matter what.

The strange thing is, I lived with the guy for a decade, and his son never did. I was thirteen years-old when they finally divorced, and his son was a newborn baby. The closest thing he ever had to an actual son was me. Yet, he pretends that the son he never knew at all is his proudest accomplishment in life.

He never watched this kid open a single Christmas present. He never sang "Happy Birthday" to him. He never accompanied him to the emergency room when he scraped himself up. Early on, he contested the obvious fact that this kid was even his. This is my son? Spare me. A free truck doesn't make up for a kid having to grow up without a father.

Luckily, with the onslaught of old age comes the ability to bite one's normally flapping lips. They took care of their paperwork exchange and I spied the scene from afar. Right where Leo always made me feel I belonged.

It was abject stupidity on my part to even think that seeing the rapidly aging step-dad again would be neat. I don't know what I was thinking, but it doesn't matter in the least. I see this weary old man, the man that used to terrorize me and my mom, as a failed man. He wasn't there for his "real" two children much younger than me when they needed him the most, and now, years later, he tries to make things right by passing out a few goodies.

But way back when, forty years ago, he had the chance to do right by someone who called him "Dad," and he failed miserably.

We eventually said our goodbyes and we rolled that bitchin' monster truck all the way back to Pennsylvania.

And today just happens to be Thanksgiving '04. This is not a holiday I normally get too excited about. I don't eat turkey, and I could do with a little less Dallas Cowboys, thank you very much.

But I am feeling pretty good about myself this year after visiting the old homestead for the very last time. Wifey's got all sorts of tantalizing foodstuffs in and on top of the stove. She's got the pumpkin pies ready to roll. Cheesecake up the wazoo. And the makings of a lot of mixed drinks to boot. I've got wifey here at the adobe. I've got the kids on the way to the adobe. And I've got the grandkids on the way to the adobe.

And Leo?

He'll spend Thanksgiving alone with his Lucky Strikes.

He has no idea how bad he screwed up.

Have a good one.

Later

************************************************

Somebody objected to my brief recounting of the 1980 Thanksgiving day beating I inflicted upon my brother-in-law.

First of all, know that it was pretty savage. Real ugly. I had one knee on his chest, one knee on the turf and I was flailing away on his head. I had to be dragged off of him.

But also know that after what I went through as a kid, I saw myself as my equally orphaned little brother's one and only protector. And being 5' 11' when I blew out 14 candles certainly didn't work to temper my auto-hostility issues.

When Ray was small, if you messed with him in any way, you then had to deal with me. And after he grew to be abnormally large as well as physically gifted and then some, if you messed with me, you then had to deal with Ray.

I was not going to see history repeated on my troubled watch, and Ray grew to be loyal to a fault. I think that's what it used to mean to be brothers...having each other's backs no matter what.

These days, the two of us would likely be shipped off to the hoosegow for being so violently heterosexual, or some such convoluted metrosexual, new-age gibberish. So be it. Screw it. If you haven't noticed, the new, more progressive ways of doing things are rushing us to the proverbial precipice. And fast.

But back in the black-and-white day, if you wanted a piece of Ray, you had to deal with Mark. And if you wanted a piece of Mark, Ray came a stompin'.

And for any or all of that, neither of us would ever offer any apologies.

G'nite