ssǝɹddns ɹou ɹɐǝɟ ɹǝɥʇıǝu plnoʍ ʎʇǝıɔos ǝǝɹɟ ʎlnɹʇ ɐ ʇɐɥʇ ƃuıʇnɔolɯnɔɹıɔ suıɐʇuoɔ ǝʇıs sıɥʇ

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

What do these two groups have in common?

Man, I have a real problem with this one.

County officials consider skate park

A skate park at the proposed site would benefit the county if it would become an alterative spot for skateboarders and bikers, who currently go to the River Common along the Susquehanna River. Skateboards are damaging sandstone construction by the park's Millennium Circle, Brozena said.

"The kids now have claimed the Millennium Circle," Brozena said.

So, due to financial restraints (to put it mildly), Luzerne County is reconsidering it’s previous commitment to renovating the train station in Wilkes-Barre. Luzerne County, due to financial restraints, has apparently decided to forego it’s previous claim of ownership of the Hotel Sterling property and essentially stick Wilkes-Barre’s residents with the cost of demolishing the dilapidated eyesore. Luzerne County, due to financial restraints, basically mothballed Moon Lake Park, which caused damage still not fully calculated.

Yet, Luzerne County is considering the creation of a new amenity, an amenity that would appeal to demographic group too microscopically small to even calculate. And the new amenity would essentially be a peace offering to the marauding “skateboarders and bikers” who always feel free to damage whatever they like.

I say we get the county detectives out of their bucolic McMansions and down to the River Common with a case of pepper spray at their disposal.

And after the lawless marauders are all expelled and sent home crying a river of cayenne pepper to their inattentive, self-centered parents, then we pave over the lot where the proposed skate park would have been.

Just what we need, another amenity we can ill afford to maintain.


And then we have this useless mumbo jumbo.

Occupy movement returns to W-B

WILKES-BARRE – Today is “Global Occupy” day, a hoped-for resurgence of last year’s efforts to call attention to economic disparity.

And while calls have gone out for mass demonstrations in cities as far flung as Torontoand Sydney, the Occupy Wilkes-Barre movement will be involved as well.

Economic disparity. Economic…disparity? Effing…economic…disparity!

Want to correct your so-called economic disparity? Yeah, then occupy a job fair!

I heard our well-known local professional protestor on Sue Henry’s WILK radio show today, and he made me want to demonstrate how many members of a drum circle I could kick the living sh*t out of.

He claimed he was poor. He claimed he has never really had health insurance benefits. He said he was an entrepreneur, or some such factually-challenged, diversionary bilge. But he went on to brag about his well-documented protesting exploits, his 50 or so hand-made protest signs and his “40-hours-a-week” of volunteerism.

Still though, he suffers as a result of the “economic disparity” in Amerika!

As for me, I work longer and harder than anyone should have to. Why? Because I like owning toys. Expensive toys. And the more, the better. Yes, Kurt. As you would say, I worship money. And I’ll tell you why.

I worship money because we only get one shot at this life of ours. If we’re lucky, we get what seem like fleeting decades as they rapidly pass us by. And if I only get one shot at this, I want to have some fun before I‘m cremated and unceremoniously dumped at Sandy Beach. And without a serious jingle in my pocket, the fun those expensive toys would provide me with will remain just out of my grasp.

And over time, I’ll resent the boys with the expensive toys I cannot afford. And I’ll grow to be bitter and resentful. And with too much time and pot on my hands, I’ll get caught up in the class warfare nonsense leading me to the nearest hardware store to purchase the paint needed for my protest signs.

Kurt, some of us bought alarm clocks, shaved every day, attended seminars, continued our educations, built resumes, ignored our supervisor’s shortcomings, endured the monotony, busted our jewels and learned how to get ahead just the slightest of bits. And now that we can afford a garage full of expensive toys, we need to be lectured to by life’s committed slackers?

Man, I don’t think so. Save that cowslip for some easily-impressed underage girls, or whomever it is that would run screaming from a random drug test and who now fills the ranks of the ambition-starved army of the occupation.

So, I ask again, what do these two groups have in common? Too much time on their hands? No purpose? No ambition? No drive? No job!?!

Come to think of it, maybe we’ll need more than one case of pepper spray.


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