I see that the Party Animal-in-Chief has taken time out from his glitzy, star-studded parties, his nonstop partisan, online organizing, his pro-am (as if) golf forays, his indoctrination-like speeches to high school and college graduates soon to be unemployable in a "jobless recovery," and his hapless hoop dreams to take a tougher tone on all things British Petroleum. Hold on a second.
Yeah, the charlatan, this here pretender of yours, the man with no resume, the ultimate demagogue, the trainee Marxist, your end-all answer to the dreaded Dubya is looking for some "ass to kick."
I know that those of you on the left side of the political divide cannot own up to your egregious error in judgment, but I would dare say that even a 65-year-old Sir Paul McCartney has forgotten more about kicking ass than this imbecilic pretender to the thrown will ever know.
I know, I know. Y'all hated Bush. And after you worked yourselves into a frenzy on behalf of that half-wit Al Gore, you believed all of that pap you read and knew full-well that it couldn't get worse than the idiot bastard son.
Well, guess what. You were wrong. You were dead wrong. You were so obviously wrong, your ability to get much of note right from here on out is now in question.
You funked that up, didn't you?
Change you could believe in? Yes you did! Easily manipulated? Yes, you are. Yes, you did!
May a politically correct god-like figure forgive you.
Your fool told the Russians to reel in Syria's Assad. And then the Russians promptly shipped their most advanced surface-to-air missiles to Syria. And your fool said we could have a dialogue with Iran, even despite their budding nuclear program and their increasing antagonism towards any and all things Israel. And the chuckling Iranians then increased their clandestine shipments of increasingly accurate rockets to Gaza-based Hamas, as well as Lebanon-based Hizbollah. All the while, Oblahblah was still publicly pushing some inane and banal peace accord deal.
And now Turkey, increasingly radicalized, emboldened by Iranian aid and pissed at what they saw as Israeli assistance of a bloody Kurdish probe into their territory has tried to embarrass Israel by provoking a bloody confrontation. And while the world busily and foolishly condemns Israel, Iranian ships are sailing towards Gaza to provoke even more bloodshed in hopes of an escalation of hostilities. And as those Iranian ships sail towards Gaza, Turkish forces with one eye on Israel are currently mobilizing to Cyprus.
And the most trusted intelligence sources available only to paid subscribers are reporting that Osama bin Laden and his closest of terrorist idiots have been sheltered "in the mountainous town of Savzevar in the northeastern Iranian province of Khorasan" for the past five years.
Meanwhile, three German-built and nuclear-armed Israeli submarines are in route to the coastline of Iran, while the Israeli's are boasting that their in-flight refueling enhancements have made long-distance air strikes on Iran's nuclear facilities a distinct possibility.
And then we have the always saber-rattling North Koreans sinking a South Korean Corvette in contested waters while we can't figure out whether or not we need to forward-deploy an aircraft carrier as a show of force to the inferior North Korean show of force.
I could go on, but I'll stop.
With WWIII just one easy-to-make mistake away from breaking out all over the place, Ba-roke Oblahblah, at Spike Lee's behest, is threatening to kick some ass...BP's ass.
Is it too much to ask that he resign and return to his homeland, wherever it is?