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Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Tora! Tora! Tora! or: how not to handle disgruntled customers

I cringe when people call WILK and quote a dictionary, as if they alone have a rudimentary command of the language. According to the...blah, blah, effing blah.

Anyway, looks like somebody added the following comments to the "Mayoral Race Roster" post and then deleted them. Either that, or the blog tools have failed yet again. Either way, I will republish those comments...

austin has left a new comment on your post "Wilkes-Barre Mayoral race roster":

Ok Mark Merriam-Webster defines integrity: firm adherence to a code of especially moral or ARTISTIC values. Attacking someone’s business on a public blog making “by your own statements false or exaggerated statements” and as for your daughters order, if she did have an issue why didn’t she call me? Trust me I would have made it right. I make it a point to satisfy every customer. Is it possible that yet another claim is unfounded?

Posted by austin to Circumlocution for Dummies at March 23, 2011 9:04 AM

Did you ever try to describe what waiting way two long for something feels like? How to portray how a 20-minute wait might have felt like an hour? How that passage of time can be agonizingly painful? Hello, Mr. Hyperbole!

Example #1: Why, the John Deere done run out of gas, so I had to walk darn near 100 miles to the nearest fillin' station.

Example#2: Me and Uncle Jiggy got hammered on his home brew, and we's so dang hungry, we waited about a quarter moon for a possom-topped pizza from Hooper's Cookin' Emporium.

In addition, only a total maroon would wait over 5 hours for a pizza. And only a total maroon would believe that I might do as much. That was (what I thought was) the first hint that hyperbole may be afoot.

And take note of the fact that I did not identify any business in that post, any mayoral hopeful, nor did I name the owner or management of said outfit. Actually, the folks going on and on about integrity and the like kind of identified themselves.

Fact is, we did make two follow-up calls that night, and both times we were told by a female employee that our order would be here shortly. But that's neither here nor there at this point.

Somebody stuck that business card-sized flyer under my windshield wiper. We tried what was then a brand new business shortly after it opened. We were far, far from being even remotely satisfied. Hence, we never bothered again. We were done. But now that somebody wants to be elected, I lack integrity, I lie and/or I make unfounded claims???

Now that's quality management! Real people-centered management. Reverse damage control, if you will.

You never ordered from us. You lie. You lack integrity. You have a rare foot disease. Your mother was homely. You...

Later

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I remember that 5 hour pizza night, I can't believe a business man would go through his records just to call you a liar. It was October 15 a friday night and after a ten hour drive pizza seemed to be the easiest dinner option, boy were we wrong.... I think it was you who suggested this new pizza place and the kids were so excited to have pizza man pizza (their words) so a little after six we placed an order and then waited. After the first hour the whines came out "we are so hungry-when is the pizza going to get here"mom called the place only to be told it's on its way. So as we waited Eb and I suggested cancelling the order and even called back after the next 45 minutes went by to see if we could pick up our order-again being told he is almost there. Also, within that second call the lady told mom the driver would give us a discount which seemed okay but never happened. The pizza did get there after 8:30 and Gage was so unhappy he said next time we should just order Dominos.
As far as making things right, how can you do that if the person you are serving comes into town twice a year, maybe next time.

Peace Cour

Frank said...

Hi Mark
Wow this gets better and better. Let me point out this a few facts for the record. How many candidates own pizza shops? You blatantly attacked me, without ever calling me as the business owner to give me an opportunity to correct the situation if there was one! We opened Oct 1, 2010, we did not start placing business card in car windows until Jan 2011, we do not now, nor have we ever had a female employee, and this is simply one has never applied. In October I was the only baker, and my Son-In-Law was the only Driver as a new business we did not hire anyone until November. Also in Oct business was so dead orders were completed within minutes of being placed. Additionally we use a program from PC America called Restaurant Pro Express so looking up an order is as simple as completing a word doc search. It’s not like I had to explore our records to find any complaint, but rest assured if it meant satisfying 1 customer I would do whatever it takes. By your own statements you have lied about me, and now you have your daughter making the same 5 hour claim, and as for the statement you made “now that I am seeking the office of mayor”, let me ask this why did you wait until I announced to complain? Why was I never contacted? Why didn’t you come see me? Is it because you’re not being truthful or shall we let the facts speak for themselves.

zorcong said...

You are correct in only one respect…it does get better and better. Actually, the surreal has now gone sublime. You are so full of it, you ought to be delivering rubber dog sh*t.

When my daughter visited, I had two of those cards in my possession. Not one, two. One was stuck in the side of our mailbox. The other was placed under the windshield wiper of my work truck on 9-24-2010 while it was positioned at Mineral Springs. I remember where I was because I was kind of annoyed that anyone would just waltz up and touch any part of my truck. And a quick check of the records at work--which must be kept in perpetuity by law--provided the date. Wait! I know, I know. I made all of that up. Right?

When we called for the pizzas in October, our intent was to hand over a card at the time of the delivery. Apparently, your record-keeping as well as your memory aren’t near at precise as you’d like to believe them to be. Or…did I make all of that, too?

As far as lies a concerned, it’s you folks sticking with the denial bit. We never called. We never ordered. We never complained.

Nothing is true according to your and yours and your drop-dead perfect computer system. Fact is, we did order. And we did call multiple times. And we did talk to a female on the phone. And we did wait well over two hours. But still, when it finally arrived, we were willing to pay for our order, leave it at that and we never bothered again.

But, now you claim that my daughter is also a liar, which my son-in-law has taken issue with. So what’s next, my grandchildren are liars, too? They are all liars as well? Damn brats!

Or could it be even more insidious and conspiratorial than that? Did the Democrats pay me to make up a pizza-gone-horribly-wrong story? Am I a plant? Seen many black helicopters lately?

Here’s the scoop: Take your pizza, your beloved 21-billion jigg-a-watt computer system, your 19 or so rabid mayoral supporters and ram them all up your snout. I won’t give you much for chances of getting elected, but you do have my sympathies.

By the way, if we stick with your defensive, fictionalized version of events, it sounds like there’s some unfair hiring practices going on over there. No females? Ever?

What’s the unemployment rate among teenagers and twenty-something’s right now?

Signed, Markie

Januzzi fan

Frank said...

Mark I think we got off on the wrong foot, again I feel the need to explain we opened Oct 1 with no outside employees My Son-In-Law, and myself from open to close. The Nationwide office next to us can confirm. We sat for most of the days with nothing to do until mid Nov when MENUS NEPA began to run, and advertising began working. We had no complaints in Oct, and we are still unable to accept Credit Cards at the door this must be done at the time the order is placed, and I know we had an issue with FDMS setting up our account, so I am not even sure if we were able to accept credit at that time. I am now wondering if it was Tino’s you called, and seriously I do not want to argue with you. Your credit card statement should show a charge in Oct that would prove if an order was placed, and with whom. We did not have any ladies working at Tino’s, and still do not we have any. We staff 1 baker, and 1 driver. As you know we are still a rather new business, and I would never what to anger any customers. Trust me when I tell you I have known who you are, and how many residents read your blog, if your daughter called me I would have corrected the issue. If for no other reason then I would have feared you may post a negative review on this blog. Believe me I have children and a grandchild when kids are hungry, cranky, and yelling 10 Min can seem like 5 hours. I do not doubt the kids would complain. I am simply saying I had no complaint, and am still unable to find either you or your daughter’s name in our computer, that’s all. So I am wondering was it my shop is all? As for the issue with the business card we did post on doors of houses at that time, my Son-In-Law, and daughter posted them.

P.S. if it was my shop I will offer an apology, and take whatever corrective action to satisfy your daughter. Regardless of how you view me politically I still value your business, and that of ever customer.

zorcong said...

Markie here...

We've got some kind of technical glitch going on here. Or some such unexplained weirdness.

Anyway, since somebody thinks I'm blocking their comments, I'll plug them in...

Frank has left a new comment on your post "Tora! Tora! Tora! or: how not to handle disgruntle...":

Mark I think we got off on the wrong foot, again I feel the need to explain we opened Oct 1 with no outside employees My Son-In-Law, and myself from open to close. The Nationwide office next to us can confirm. We sat for most of the days with nothing to do until mid Nov when MENUS NEPA began to run, and advertising began working. We had no complaints in Oct, and we are still unable to accept Credit Cards at the door this must be done at the time the order is placed, and I know we had an issue with FDMS setting up our account, so I am not even sure if we were able to accept credit at that time. I am now wondering if it was Tino’s you called, and seriously I do not want to argue with you. Your credit card statement should show a charge in Oct that would prove if an order was placed, and with whom. We did not have any ladies working at Tino’s, and still do not we have any. We staff 1 baker, and 1 driver. As you know we are still a rather new business, and I would never what to anger any customers. Trust me when I tell you I have known who you are, and how many residents read your blog, if your daughter called me I would have corrected the issue. If for no other reason then I would have feared you may post a negative review on this blog. Believe me I have children and a grandchild when kids are hungry, cranky, and yelling 10 Min can seem like 5 hours. I do not doubt the kids would complain. I am simply saying I had no complaint, and am still unable to find either you or your daughter’s name in our computer, that’s all. So I am wondering was it my shop is all? As for the issue with the business card we did post on doors of houses at that time, my Son-In-Law, and daughter posted them.

P.S. if it was my shop I will offer an apology, and take whatever corrective action to satisfy your daughter. Regardless of how you view me politically I still value your business, and that of ever customer.


Posted by Frank to Circumlocution for Dummies at March 25, 2011 9:15 PM

zorcong said...

Just to clear something up, the "card" I was referring to was the business card that was placed under my wiper, not a credit card. Much unlike our debt-piling career politicians, I do not do credit cards.

Honestly, no explanations or apologies are needed. As a former restauranteur, I know what it's like to open a brand new store manned mostly by trainees, but with a sprinkling of trainers. Stuff happens, but hopefully not too much.

As far as political ideology goes, I, like you, am a registered Republican. Personally, I have no beef with you. And I think somebody may have overreacted to what I viewed at the time as nothing more than ball busting.

Case in point: Many, many years ago, an emailer asked me why I so staunchly supported Tom Leighton.

I responded by saying--in print--that Leighton had offered me a cushy City job for my support.

When he heard about it, the future mayor cracked up. He knows what many know about me, that I'm good at stirring things up and that I'm a (fill in the blank).

Mark

Frank said...

Mark
Thank you.